


Spreadsheets!

by Welsper



Category: Crossover Fandom, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Fic Exchanges, M/M, Spreadsheets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-12
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:40:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22217923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Welsper/pseuds/Welsper
Summary: Bow to the wisdom of the gods, mortal.
Relationships: Takami Keigo | Hawks & Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos, Takami Keigo | Hawks/Todoroki Enji | Endeavor
Comments: 6
Kudos: 12
Collections: Exchanges After Dark Birthday Bash 2020





	Spreadsheets!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pleurer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pleurer/gifts).



> I don't understand how spreadsheets work and you can't make me.

“Enough with the spreadsheets already!” Keigo cried, struggling in vain against the tight grip of the tentacles curled around him. “Stop!”

“But if you would only listen!” Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos implored and Keigo gasped out for air as his face was held in place by clawed tendrils and he was forced to look upon the blinding light of the laptop screen.

What kind of monster used _day mode_?

Charts and columns and filters blurred before him, until they were a mass of information and it was so much, entirely too much. Keigo felt his mind fading, but if he gave up now… then the heroes would be blind to Shigaraki’s machinations, the terror he would unleash upon the world. And then he could never sit on Endeavor-san’s lap while playing video games, the world peaceful and boring. Keigo was so damn sick of villains.

And spreadsheets wouldn’t save them from that!

“But the time you could save! The streamlining of tasks! They are so useful!”

He hadn’t said that out loud, had he?

“What the fuck! Get out of my mind!” Keigo shouted.

Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos didn’t exactly have a _face_ , but somehow, Keigo could tell it was pouting.

“I am only trying to help!”

“I don’t need spreadsheets! Tell my sidekicks or something, they do the paperwork!”

“But you could use them to easily sort the tags for fic exchanges too! All your favorite freeforms for Hero RPF, only a click away, without the hassle of going through former tagsets and letters and scattered word documents!”

“What! I don’t need that,” Keigo said, a bit too quickly. He was flustering, his wings curling as if to hide himself. They were caught by tentacles and pulled back, so tightly Keigo made a pained noise. He didn’t struggle, not anymore. He had tried before and Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos had laughed for it, nearly shattering his eardrums with the wailing sounds.

“Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos sees all, young Hawks,” Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos said. “Endeavor-san, please, please, fuck me!” Keigo whined, squirming in Endeavor’s lap, after he straddled his enormous thighs. He was grinding his pulsing cock against the flame hero’s massive erection, a cock longer than Keigo’s forearm and twice as wide. Keigo could not fit his fingers around it, even with both hands and he longed to see how -”

“Alright, alright! Enough!” Keigo shouted, his face as red as his feathers as Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos read from his Takami Keigo | Keigo/Todoroki Enji | Endeavor fanfiction Keigo posted under roastmedaddy69. “I’ll use the spreadsheets, okay? Just… stop reading.”

Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos still had nothing that even resembled an expression a human could understand but Keigo could tell he looked happy now. The tentacles wriggled happily and Keigo was gently set down on the ground.

He caught a USB drive in his hand and stared down at it. There were little heart stickers on it.

“I put all my favorite tutorials on there! And a playlist for studying! You’re going to love it, I promise you!”

Time shook as Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos unfolded itself from reality and was then gone, leaving Keigo with a good measure of confusion and homework.

But sign-ups for Praline Box were going to open tomorrow… maybe he could give those spreadsheets a try? He was so sick of adding the commas manually as he slammed 300 freeforms into the optional details box.

There could never be too many tags about how fucking big and long Endeavor-san’s cock was. Keigo bet it could even rival one of Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos’ tentacles, and Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos didn’t even exist in a dimension humans could understand.

Keigo sighed as he loaded up the files in his phone and stared at the tutorials.

Actually, grasping the way Blind Azathoth the Crawling Chaos manifested in the universe might be easier than learning how to make those damn spreadsheets.

  
  



End file.
